The Day I Got Woken Up Early.

After staying up nice and late last night, I was tired. And the fact that I was sitting there in Iowa instead of being home with my friends wasn't exactly making me the happiest girl alive. So I quite replying to all my "Happy New Years" text messages. And Prayed. I don't much remember what about, but I'm sure it was a nice long conversation.

Then, I fell asleep.

I woke up this morning to peoples voices. Now, nobody ever really comes down and hangs out down in the basement where I've been sleeping on a nice lovely couch. But, for some reason, today they did. So I woke up to my mom and Grandpa talking about just whatever, to be honest, I was so sleepy and angry I don't recall the exact conversations. Maybe it was something about doctors. I don't know. All I know is that I was mad. Almost in tears ready to throw a fit kind of mad. I shoved my pillow over my face to let them know my anger. and they noticed. But, of course, they didn't care. But I wouldn't budge. I had absolutely no intentions of getting up. What seemed like hours later, they finally left.
So I should have been happy, right?
Yes!
But Was I...
No.
Because after all that fuss, I was still mad. And all that time had gradually eased away all sleepiness I had previously felt. I was so caught up in the past, it had ruined my sleep.

And somehow this all reminded me of some lyrics from the soundtrack of Letters to God. (My Absolute FAVORITE Movie BTW. Haha. :])
"When I'm buried in the questions, I can't find the answer. I close my eyes and listen, till I remember. When everything was beautiful."

And I realize the whole situation was silly, not something really worth your time to read. But for me, it was a lovely realization reminder. That, well, everything is beautiful. I was so caught up in my anger that I disrupted a father and daughter having a conversation. Something that rarely gets to happen considering we live in two very different states. For all I know it could have been the most beautiful thing and I just despised it. Then when I was finally left alone. I was so caught up. Nothing was beautiful. I wanted more. I needed more. But thats not how it works. I forgot to see how beautiful every single second is. And for that, Im sorry Lord.